August 12, 2006

Who is The Dartmouth's Worst Op-Ed Writer?

We'll have to keep this poll informal, without the benefits of radio buttons or bar graphs or pie charts or things like that, but I am interested in your answers to the above question.

My vote, I think, has to go to Maxwell Bryer. There is something extraordinarily irritating to me about the way he manages to completely ignore the possible existence of even the slightest touch of nuance in any of his op-eds. Not only that, but he seems to feel that his audience is simply thick and cannot understand something if it is only said once. Exemplum gratia:
[S]ophomore summer remains a "real" term despite our deepest desires to transform it into "Camp Dartmouth" in both name and practice. The papers and exams are still there and the grades most definitely count. This is a fact that cannot be denied, sidestepped or ignored no matter how much beer in which we attempt to drown it. This is the unfortunate truth of sophomore summer that we must all accept.
Okay, well, while I'm at it (Ben Taylor, if you're reading this, I'm really sorry--I'm not trying to just start D-bashing, but this kid really pisses me off), here are one sentence summations of his 6 op-eds.
Well, there you have it—the authorial career of one Maxwell Bryer. May a boll weevil nest in his motherboard.

4 comments:

  1. I don't read the D enough to know all their op-ed writers, but I'd say this kid is in the running for the way he mangled the sentence, "This is a fact that cannot be denied, sidestepped or ignored no matter how much beer in which we attempt to drown it," so it wouldn't end in a preposition. Anyone who is willing to publish a sentence like that with their name attached to it clearly has limited English language capabilities. I feel like you should also include Debra Wassail in this poll, though, for this column, http://www.thedartmouth.com/article.php?aid=2006081002010, the point of which seems to be, "I don't know any lesbian sorority girls, therefore there are no lesbians in the Dartmouth sorority system. She also displays an understanding of affirmative action reminiscent on Alicia Silverstone's understanding of immigration in Clueless.

    Of course, if we expanded this poll to include all Dartmouth contributors, not just the op-ed writers, I would vote hands down for Daniel Hundert, the writer of the "Daily Limerick" feature. You already know my feelings on that subject.

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  2. Anonymous12:09 PM

    I emphatically second the deb wassel nomination.

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  3. "I, for one, am taking action against this travesty of American film. I will not stand for it. To this end, I have just recently purchased on E-bay an original, unaltered VHS copy of the Star Wars trilogy which I will one day show to my children so that they may experience it as I have."

    because when a film is on VHS, that film is FOREVER.

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  4. I sincerely hope this person is not a journalism major - or an English major, for that matter.

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